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September 13, 2016 / Retirementallychallenged.com

GratiTuesday: Lucky Thirteen

 

My husband and I were married thirteen years ago, on the thirteenth of September, after being together for thirteen years.

We didn’t plan it that way; it was just how everything happened to align.

One of my husband’s favorite anecdotes about our getting married is that he never really asked me to marry him.

It’s true, at least in the formal, romantic proposal, actually asking me sense…

A little over a year before we were married, we attended his high school reunion in northern California. I didn’t grow up in the same community so most of the people there were strangers to me. During the event, introductions were uncomfortable since most people assumed that I was his wife. Referring to me as his “date” wasn’t at all correct, “partner” sounded stiff and business-like, and I was certainly more than a “girlfriend” (by that time we owned a home together).

On our drive home, I told him how awkward I felt because we didn’t have a simple way to define our relationship to others. That’s when he very innocently said, “Well, maybe we should think about getting married.” Silly man… I was thinking that it was about time too and, before he knew what hit him, we had a date set and wedding plans beginning to form.

wedding

I am so very grateful for my husband and the life we have built together. Although it took us thirteen years to make it official, we’ve been together for twenty-six years and I’d happily marry him again today (whether he asked me or not). God knows we can drive each other crazy at times, but the inscription on our wedding invitation thirteen years ago is still true today:

This day I will marry my friend…

The one I laugh with, dream with,

live for and love.

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42 Comments

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  1. snakesinthegrass2014 / Sep 13 2016 6:17 pm

    A beautiful picture and a great story! My wife always complains that I never got on my knees when I proposed to her– I always have to remind her that she was sitting in my lap. 🙂

    • Retirementallychallenged.com / Sep 13 2016 6:22 pm

      Ha! I think those types of proposals are WAY better than boring ‘ole get down on your knees proposals. Where’s the story in that?

  2. Lois.eckmann / Sep 13 2016 6:20 pm

    Beautiful! Thanks for sharing and giving me a reason to tear up…

    Sent from my iPad

    >

  3. dconnollyislandgmailcom / Sep 13 2016 6:29 pm

    Happy Anniversary, Janis! Thirteen seems like a very lucky number for you. I think that a lottery ticket is in order!
    (: Donna
    http://www.retirementreflections.com

  4. Joanne Sisco / Sep 13 2016 6:54 pm

    What a lovely photo, Janis! I LOVE your dress. It’s a stunning colour.

    … and I happen to really like the number 13 🙂
    Congratulations!

    • Retirementallychallenged.com / Sep 14 2016 9:06 am

      Thank you! I had no interest in a traditional gown… or a traditional ceremony. The great thing about getting married when you are older is that it is easier to do it on your own terms.

      • Joanne Sisco / Sep 14 2016 11:25 am

        I married when I was relatively young, but no one has ever used the word ‘traditional’ to describe me 😉

  5. edebock / Sep 13 2016 10:59 pm

    My husband didn’t ask me to marry him either! We still laugh about the fact that there was no formal proposal. We married exactly 13 months after the day we met though and now we’re about to celebrate our 40th anniversary!

  6. Liesbet / Sep 14 2016 3:41 am

    Ooow. That is so nice, Janis. The inscription is such a wonderful description of your wedding and your marriage. In Belgium, couples live together for a long time before they marry (if they marry). I truly think it is the way to go. Congratulations with your anniversary. Thirteen is my favorite number. Oh, and Mark never proposed to me either… until right before our ring “ceremony” on our wedding party with friends and family, years after the “official” ceremony. 🙂

    • Retirementallychallenged.com / Sep 14 2016 2:12 pm

      Living together worked for us for awhile, but I really like being married. Funny that you had a post-marriage proposal.

  7. rporter610 / Sep 14 2016 6:52 am

    What a lovely memoir of your years together! And the photo of you two is beautiful. I’m happy for you and wish you many more years of life and love.

    Rin

  8. Keith / Sep 14 2016 7:14 am

    Happy anniversary.26 years of friendship. You make a cute couple.

    • Retirementallychallenged.com / Sep 14 2016 2:15 pm

      Yes, 26 years of friendship! Husband and wife is good, best friends, even better.

      • Keith / Sep 15 2016 1:47 pm

        Agreed. Being able to make each other laugh is highly underrated.

  9. Under the Oaks / Sep 14 2016 8:22 am

    Happy Anniversary! A lovely anniversary post!

  10. susan@onesmallwalk / Sep 14 2016 8:50 am

    What a lovely story😃

  11. Joe / Sep 14 2016 9:42 am

    You and your husband are a very attractive couple. Happy baker’s dozen!

    • Retirementallychallenged.com / Sep 15 2016 1:26 pm

      That’s so nice of you! I should have thought to get my husband a baker’s dozen of something sweet (he has a sweet tooth) for our anniversary! We don’t “do” gifts anymore… unless you can eat or drink them.

      • Joe / Sep 15 2016 6:37 pm

        Like you and your husband, we don’t do gifts either, just “consumables”. My favorites are craft beers and garlic-stuffed green olives.

  12. Anabel Marsh / Sep 14 2016 1:16 pm

    Aw, congratulations and happy anniversary! What a lovely picture too.

  13. patwdoyle11 / Sep 14 2016 2:07 pm

    Wonderful story and congratulations! My hubby in fact asked me twice… the first time, in the middle of the parking lot on the way to my best high school friend’s wedding reception. Something like what your husband said – “hey, maybe we should get married too”. My response was… if you’re going to ask me that, you had better ask me correctly! Which he proceeded to do a couple of months later (playing on the second time asking component). We had only known each other for 6 months when he first asked me! He always says he was sure of it way before I was. We’re 24 years married. Like you, I too married my friend, who has become my best friend. I’m glad you married yours!

    • Retirementallychallenged.com / Sep 15 2016 1:33 pm

      Wow – twice… and the first time after only six months! My parents were married over fifty years, getting married after knowing each other for only three months, so I guess there isn’t always a need to wait. 🙂

  14. Terri Webster Schrandt / Sep 14 2016 6:54 pm

    Wow, you were (and are) a beautiful couple! Happy 13th Anniversary! Love the 13 alignments–so cool when that happens!

  15. Carol Ferenc / Sep 18 2016 1:48 pm

    Happy Belated Anniversary, Janis! Isn’t it wonderful being married to your best friend? My hubby and I celebrated our 31st anniversary this year on September 13th. And we were married on a Friday. Lucky thirteen, indeed!

  16. Carol Cassara (@ccassara) / Sep 19 2016 7:58 am

    You look like you belong together, happy! I’m happy you found me again and glad to see you.;)))

  17. petakaplan / Sep 25 2016 5:05 am

    Beautiful photo and wedding inscription… Lucky 13 indeed!

    Peta

  18. laura bruno lilly / Sep 26 2016 5:25 pm

    Thanks for offering a cool numbers slant to your post…I always enjoy finding number-connections.
    Congrats, and I love your dress, was it silk?

    • Retirementallychallenged.com / Sep 28 2016 3:37 pm

      I like number connections too! I’m not sure what the dress was made of, but I don’t think silk… I didn’t want to spend a lot of money on something I’d probably wear once.

  19. lisadorenfest / Oct 14 2016 8:54 pm

    Thirteen is a lucky number indeed. Love you wedding photo. Great dress and you all look so happy!

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