Time Keeps on Ticking…

It is hard to believe that so many years had passed since graduating, but when the invitation to my 50th high school reunion appeared in my inbox, reality set in. I am still friends with a lot of my classmates – many since grade school, even one who I met while still in diapers – so I’ve seen us age through the years. I can’t deny how the march of time has changed us physically, but most of us are still active and engaged. We aren’t all retired but for the most part, those who still work choose to because they are excited about what they do.

I know that some people don’t have fond memories of high school and the last thing they want to do is get together with their former classmates. But, for me, last weekend’s event was an opportunity to catch up. We had a large graduating class, and a good number came to the reunion. It wasn’t possible to talk to everybody I wanted to, but it was nice to see everyone have a good time. There was a lot of gray hair, multiple bald heads, and a few walkers and canes but, despite that, I thought most of us looked pretty good.

I went to grade school with all of these lovely women.

Just like at my husband’s 50th last year, there was an In Memoriam display with the pictures of over 60 classmates who had died since graduation. Some I was aware of; others came as a shock. When we graduated from high school, most of us looked forward to our futures with excitement. No one on the display could foresee the diseases, accidents, drugs, or inner struggles that took them way too early.

I count myself as one of the lucky ones. My health is decent, I haven’t experienced many significant life setbacks, I have an abundance of friends, and I have a good marriage. I also know that any of those could change in the blink of an eye. As we’ve recently seen from tragic events occurring around the world, we are not always in complete control of our lives.

When I graduated at age 17, I was anxious to go to college and start my passage into adulthood. Now, 50 years later, I look back at my journey with gratitude. Gosh knows I made mistakes, not everything was (or is) perfect, but it’s been pretty darn good. And the great thing is that I’m still a work in progress; I continue to have lots to learn and adventures to experience.

I hope that when the invitation comes for my 60th reunion in 2033, I will still be skipping down that path.

Check out the What’s Been on My Calendar link-up to see what others have been up to this month.

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Author: Janis @ RetirementallyChallenged.com

My blog is about travel, relationships, photography, and whatever else pops into my head (even, sometimes, issues surrounding retirement and aging).

102 thoughts on “Time Keeps on Ticking…”

  1. Janis, I am in the middle of helping to plan our 50th, which we have set for next month. Just the planning of it has been fun. We are doing a 3 day event as we did for our 40th. That way if you can’t come to one event, there are two other choices. Hope it turns out as nice as yours sounds like it did. I am making our memory board. So sad to see those faces, many of whom died way too young. We only have 30 that I know of but there may be more that we just haven’t heard about.

    1. I am so grateful for the group of volunteers that put together our events (also three days, although I only attended two of the get togethers). It was obvious how much work went into everything. Seeing those pictures on the board was very impactful.

      Have fun at your reunion! It really is a special event that we are lucky to be able to attend.

  2. In my graduating class, a few of my classmates died in the Viet Nam war. So tragic. 💔 ~Carol @ReadingLadies

  3. What a lovely heartfelt post full of gratitude Janis. You are certainly making the most of your time which is wonderful to see. As you say anything can happen to change the status quo of any of us and any time. I’m still a work in progress too :). Thanks for joining us for #WBOYC this month, it’s always a delight to read your posts.

    2. Agreed! And a lot of it has to do with… YOU. I recently read that there are few true friends that one can gain throughout one’s life past the school years. And most of us lose touch with those folks.

      Kudos to you for having such strong and lasting friendships!

      1. I know that it can be harder to make good friends after we leave school. Work friends often come and go and, while I don’t have kids, I understand that adult friendships made through your kids can fade once circumstances change. Funny, though, I have been fortunate to make some very dear, IRL friends through blogging… something I never would have guessed when I started my blog almost ten years ago.

  4. Hi Janis, You will likely hear this over and over again. The women in this photo look gorgeous! I would never have guessed a 50 year reunion. The In Memoriam is always poignant and a reality check. A good point how things could change rapidly. My 50th is 2024. I believe reunions are more precious as time goes by, for good reason. Thanks for the update. Hugs to you, Janis, and Paul. xoxo

    1. Good to hear from you, Erica! All those women (and several more who aren’t in the picture) are interesting, engaged, and a lot of fun. I also have a hard time believing that it’s been so long since we were all in high school together. I hope you have a great time at your reunion next year, the 50th is not to be missed. Hugs back to you!

  5. I love this. I went to my 40th last summer. It’s extra special when you knew those people from 1st grade to 12th grade.

  7. It’s a ‘must do’, isn’t it? Long ago I did a 40th and it’s great to see how everyone’s life turned out and exchange a few hugs. There are always, though, the ‘ones that got away’.

  9. It sounds like you are one lucky woman to be lifetime friends with those smiling ladies. It is always interesting to find out how high school classmates evolved once you move beyond those high school walls. RIP to all those who go way too soon.

  11. This is such a heartwarming post, Janis! The fact that you have so many grade school and high school friends is quite impressive, and it speaks volumes about your commitment to those friendships. Large social functions like reunions are difficult for both Alan and me to endure; neither one of us had any interest in attending any of our reunions. I’ve remained in touch with one grade school friend and about a half dozen high school friends. In fact, we saw several of them in Boston earlier this year. I value the connections, but not the crowds. Friendship is a blessing that never fails to strengthen and improve the fabric of our lives.

    1. Once every ten years is enough for me too 🙂 I don’t usually do well in large groups of people either, but this was important enough to pretend that I am less introverted than I really am. I guess it also helps that I am still friends with enough of my class that I always had someone to talk to. Friendship is a blessing, and I am fortunate to be included in this accomplished, interesting group of women.

  13. You are very lucky. My bestie from high school passed 10 years ago. The group I was in dispersed and I haven’t seen them in close to 50 years. I didn’t remain connected with anyone from grammar school although I kind of know where most of them are (my grammar class was 18 kids). Most of my friends are from my working years and now through my retirement neighborhood. My husband is like you and is still connected to his childhood friend who lived a few doors down and went all through school with him. I didn’t go to my 50th but I did follow on-line and saw all the pictures. Most I recognized through the graying hair, bald heads (not as many as you’d think) and extra weight (hey, at 18 we were all skinny!). Fortunately that was all I needed. My friends from high school did not go either so there was no enticement. My sis-in-law’s high school class has a luncheon every year. (She is 93.) From the hundreds that attended the reunion dinner dances down to under 20 for lunch. Passage of time but she wouldn’t miss it for the world.

    1. I do wonder what the next reunion will look like (assuming I still get to be one of the lucky ones 🙂 ). I wouldn’t be surprised if each 10 years it becomes a little less fancy (even at this one not many got dressed up). I think many of us still stay in touch – and get together now and then – because we either still live in the same city, state, or have family here. That makes it a lot easier.

  14. How fascinating that you have so many friends still from your younger years! I have one friend from high-school I stay in touch with, but irregularly. None from grade school. I’m not even sure if my high school class does reunions! I think it’s just amazing you’ve kept in touch with so many of your classmates.

    1. I think the fact that most of us live in the same city or state helps us stay in touch. Funny thing is that a couple of the women weren’t close friends of mine in high school (I knew them, but we didn’t hang out with the same people). We reconnected at the 40th reunion and realized that we had a lot in common.

  15. I’m glad you had an enjoyable time at your reunion. Smiles all around, eh?

    [I’m one of the people who doesn’t do high school reunions, I moved away from my small town for good reasons.]

  16. Your 50th is unique. From a large metro area, the 9 of you managed to maintain friendships forged over the years – starting as kids from the neighborhood! An inspiring testament to the strong bonds of friendship among all of you!

  18. Hi Janis, I am glad you went to your reunion and even happier that you had a good time. That is a cool looking bunch of almost 70 ladies, you included. I was ambivalent about attending mine, so when I had to cancel because of a family situation, I realized I was actually disappointed. The nice part is that I can see most of the people who mattered to me whenever I visit my family who still live where I grew up.

  19. I am so glad for you, Janis. I loved your photos and hearing what a wonderful time you had. My 50th was in 2020 and there was a reunion despite Covid, but my daughter was ill and there was no way I could chance it. I was so sorry to miss, what did turn out to be a very small party because of circumstances. I am happy that I have held onto many high school friends. I’m delighted you had this opportunity. Special memories. 🙂

  21. I’ve never been to a single HS reunion and never will…but my circumstances are unique. We moved in the summer before my senior year, so I never really knew anyone from my high school. Except for my ex-wife, dammit. THAT is why it will never happen.

    I’ve always envied those who were able to maintain friendships after graduating. It’s so different from my experience. I can’t wait to read about your 60th reunion in ten years!

  22. A 50-year HS reunion is such an amazing milestone, Janis! You all look fabulous in the picture. 2028 is our 50th, but we manage to keep up with many of our friends on Facebook. My hubby and I graduated in 1978 from a high school in San Diego. Several of our classmates who have divorced have re-met our new partners at our last reunions or through social media. It was fun at our 40th to arrive as a couple at the reunion. Did you graduate in San Diego? Anyway, great reflection and I can totally see you skipping to your 60th!

    1. We had several classmates – or at least close to the same year – couples (that I was aware of) who either have been together for a while or got together more recently. I bet there were some surprised faces when you and Hans walked in together to your 40th! Facebook has helped a lot of us maintain contact that would have been harder without social media.

  23. Hi, Janis – That sounds like an awesome reunion. I especially love the photo of you and your friends that you have known since grade school — you all look fabulous.
    I can’t wait to catch up and hear more about this event.
    I continued to nod my head and your comments of gratitude. We are very fortunate indeed!

  25. I’ve avoided my reunions so far – although the 40th is next year. We moved around every couple of years when I was a kid & I went to 3 different high schools and did my final year at a new school. As a result I feel as though I never got to know anyone really and keep in touch with very few people. You all look so good though!

    1. Hi Jo! I can understand why changing high schools like that would have left you feeling unattached to any of them. I can’t imagine trying to make friends and fit in with a whole new set of classmates like that. I feel very lucky that my folks didn’t move around.

  26. Well you make it sound fun Janis. My 50-year reunion is next weekend, but I don’t plan on going. I have not gone to any of them thus far. We had a large class: 613 and 144 of them have passed away. I was 17 when I graduated from high school too – I had just turned 17 in April. Glad you had a memorable time.

    1. I understand that reunions aren’t for everyone… for lots of reasons. Our class wasn’t as large as yours, but it was up there. I wonder why such a high percentage – about 23% – have died. Are you still friends with any of your former classmates?

      1. Janis, I do keep in touch with several school classmates, all whom I discovered when I joined Facebook back in 2009. Coincidentally, one of them is on the reunion committee. She lives in North Carolina and will attend, but the other friends are not planning to attend.

        I had five close friends in high school – the six of us were inseparable the last two years of high school. We got together at Christmastime 1973 and we were already different – three of us (including me) had started college; the other three had jobs. In 1978, we got together, just the six of us, for a five-year reunion for dinner but that magical friendship seemed to be gone. We had nothing in common anymore. My favorite friend of that group passed away from cancer in 2007. I have not kept in touch with any of this group of friends.

        There is a Facebook group site that was created for the 40-year reunion and because it was such a large class there are many people I don’t recognize, by face, nor by name. I do wonder about the high percentage of deaths in our class as well. There is also a Facebook group for all Lincoln Park High School student deaths since the high school opened in 1960, segregated by year. So, taking a look at our June class (and there was a January class 1973 with around 150 graduates as well), for our class I see most of them had heart attacks or cancer, a few suicides and ODs. Some the cause of death was not listed. I hope you do attend your 60th reunion – maybe I’ll be persuaded to go to that one.

          1. Yes, that is true – I connected to those folks the first day on Facebook, immediately after putting in my hometown and high school. You never know. 🙂

  27. You are indeed fortunate! How wonderful to get together with such a lovely group and to have such a long history shared. It’s good to take a moment of gratitude when we’ve had a blessed life. I consider myself very fortunate and know it could change any time.

  30. A wonderful self-recognition of both achievement and reflection. I’m ambivalent about h.s. reunions, but your experience is giving me some pause. That’s a really great pic of all of you to boot. – Marty

  31. I think it’s so nice to have the chance to reconnect with people from your high school years! Teenagers are so different from adults, and it can be fun to see the sort of people your old classmates became. The sad thing is losing so many of them…just a reminder to live life to its fullest every day.

    1. You are absolutely right. The classmates I am closest to now aren’t necessarily the ones I hung out with in high school. That In Memoriam display was such a vivid reminder that life is short, and not everyone is fortunate enough to even make it this far.

  32. Sounds great! I’m not sure this is such a big thing here. We did have a reunion about 15 years ago when the old school was about to be demolished, and I went with the one person I am still friends with from those days. We met others we had known and not seen since school – and haven’t seen since either! It was nice to catch up but we had all moved on.

    1. We all have busy lives and can’t always make room for more (people, activities, commitments, etc.) but it is nice to catch up with people who were such a big part of our day-to-day way back when. I don’t know if regular reunions are a “thing” elsewhere (so far, I’ve heard “yes” from a Canadian and an Australian), but I enjoyed the opportunity to see old friends.

  33. What a lovely post, Janis. I graduated at 17, and the years are ticking along so fast. I remember when I thought 5 years was a long time!

  34. It looks and sounds like you had a great time at the reunion. I’ve been curious about what happened to my classmates of high school and college, but I’m not aware of any reunions. Apparently, someone would need to take the initiative to organize one as the high school/college itself does not take part in such things.

    If there would be a reunion, I probably won’t be able to join anyway, unless it coincides with a visit to Belgium. That being said, five years ago or so, someone of my old school put a little lunch together for anyone she had contact info of on Facebook, because I happened to be in the country. 🙂

    It’s nice to read that you are still in touch with some of your classmates!

  35. Some of those ladies don’t look capable of being the age they must be. That’s great that you’re still in touch with so many friends from high school, grade school, diaper school… Wonderful that you still have so many blessings. May rest be granted to those who have already passed. :/

  36. You are all beautiful! Happy you could celebrate together. I had a mini reunion with my besties from high school a couple weeks ago. I’m very grateful for our long lasting friendship. We joked about taking charge of our 50th reunion. We will see, haha!

    1. I know that putting together a reunion like this takes a lot of work and I am grateful for those who take it on. I wonder if they are starting to plan our 60th? I’m happy you got to get together with your friend… it’s nice to make the effort to connect.

  37. Oh, you all look great! 50 years — that’s awesome….and it sounds like you all had a wonderful time!

    My husband and I will be attending his 45th high school reunion next week. He grew up in a small town and knew so many people so it’s exciting for him. I, on the other hand, went to a large high school and as an introvert, stuck to a small group of friends.

    1. I hope you have a great time at your husband’s reunion! Even if I didn’t know a former classmate well, it was nice to chat a bit and learn a bit about where they landed 50 years later. Of course, just like on Facebook, you don’t get the whole story ( 🙂 ) but it seems that most of us turned out pretty well.

  38. It sounds like the reunion was well worth it, Janis. Not only to see old friends, but to reinvigorate the old perspective. We are indeed lucky to have these miraculous lives.

    1. We are lucky and I think it’s important to take stock and remind ourselves now and then. Seeing old friends – both those alive and well, as well as those who have passed – helped to reinforce my sense of gratitude. “Miraculous lives”… I love that!

  39. Janis, it looks like you had a wonderful time at your reunion! And that’s a beautiful, happy group of women. How fun that you’ve been friends with some of them since grade school! There’s definitely something special about friendships that have shared history. 🙂

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  41. My “oldest” friend I met when I was 9 months old and she was a baby. We went thru all our schooling together. We are very close 64 years later. We haven’t lived in the same place since 1977, but our kids and grandkids are friends. So I totally get why you went back.

      1. Next week I am off for a week with my “twisted sisters” who are my nursing friends. We lived together from 18 to 21 and can finish each other’s sentences! Yes comfort indeed.

  42. How lovely that you went to this event, Janis. I’m glad you had an amazing time. I’m guessing you’re in contact with some of the people from your high school days? It must be amazing finding out what they’ve been up to in life since you all last met.

    Any reason why there are no guys in the photo? I’m just curious. Was there a good mixture of men and women at the event?

    My school days were not good, so it’s not something I would attend. But it’s good to hear the stories from those who attend these events.

    1. Hi Hugh! The photo was from a pre-event my friend hosted and most of the men were spouses. That particular photo was of all of us who not only attended high school together but met in elementary school. I am in various degrees of ongoing contact with all of them. Our actual reunion was a good mixture of men and women.

      High school is a very complicated time of growing up and I know that not everyone enjoys the experience. I wish I had been more aware then of those who were struggling and had done something to bring at least a bit of happiness and comfort into their lives.

      1. Good to hear there was a good mix, Janis.

        Yes, now I look back, I wish I had done more about the bullying I witnessed at school. It wasn’t only me affected, but others too. Back then, I was too afraid to intervene incase the bullies turned their attention back to me. Not happy days, but I’m glad things are much better for victims of bullying now.

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