slowing down – Retirementally Challenged

Even though it’s my birth month, I’ve never been a big fan of January. When I was young, I envied those who had summer birthdays and could celebrate with a pool party, beach bash, or an outdoor BBQ. Because my birthday closely follows the holiday season, people are pretty much over it by then, and in no mood to celebrate. After the big run-up to Christmas (that now begins as early as October), January can feel like a bit of a letdown, a sad gray month with little to get excited about.

In the Northern Hemisphere, January is known for low temps and dreary weather, the winter doldrums. Even though it doesn’t snow where we live, January is often our coldest and wettest month. February can be cold and wet too, but at least it has the good sense to last only 28 days, as opposed to January’s 31.

Recently, an article in The New York Times by Steven Kurutz has me rethinking my dislike of January. Reading his homage to the month, I began to realize that it’s actually the lack of much going on that makes it wonderful. There are fewer crowds and even fewer social obligations. There is less traffic on the roads and not as many people in stores and restaurants.

Just last night, as we drove to meet friends for dinner, my husband remarked about how little traffic there was. When we got to the restaurant, we were seated right away in an outdoor courtyard near some space heaters. We were warm and cozy and enjoyed a nice leisurely dinner with our friends, not feeling the least bit rushed so the table could be turned for the next guests.

January has a slower rhythm that allows us to relax, reflect, and rejuvenate. The cold weather is often a great excuse to spend time indoors organizing, decluttering, making soup, or just cuddling up with a good book. It’s a month made for introverts.

I no longer wish I could have a beach party or BBQ on my birthday. As the days slowly lengthen – we gain about a half an hour of daylight over the course of the month – I know there will be plenty of opportunities for outdoor celebrations when the weather warms up. For now, I’m happy to enjoy the sense of calm that January brings, allowing me to breathe again.

My husband’s caramelized orange cheesecake is the only birthday gift I need.

This post is linked to the monthly What’s Been on Your Calendar? linkup hosted by Donna, Deb, Jo, and Sue.

Since this would be the first time either of us had visited Spain, our itinerary included three of the largest cities: Barcelona, Madrid, and Seville. It was tempting to add other cities, towns, and villages but we didn’t want our trip to become a whirlwind of rushed travel. A week’s stay in each of the three cities seemed just about right.

Many guidebooks list the top attractions to see if you are in a location for a short amount of time (one, two, or three days, for example) and, frankly, that sounds exhausting. Because we had more time in each city, we could not only sightsee, but also relax, people watch, and enjoy a less frenzied pace.

Turns out, this less-packed itinerary was the perfect way to embrace Spain and its relaxed lifestyle. It was not unusual to see outdoor cafes full of groups of people in the afternoon, enjoying a glass of wine, sharing a few tapas, and actually talking to each other. If a table was full of people staring at their phones, it was an excellent chance they weren’t Spaniards.

In the U.S., I would feel guilty sitting at a restaurant table for a long time and only ordering a glass of wine. I was a server long ago and turning tables quickly was not only what the management wanted, it helped to increase my tips. Besides, since the customers often were on their way somewhere else, they appreciated getting in and out.

Not so in Spain. They seemingly have perfected the art of chill. That doesn’t mean they don’t work hard too, it’s just that they have successfully compartmentalized the two.

Because we often had no particular place to be, my husband and I enthusiastically embraced this lifestyle. After an afternoon of sightseeing, we’d find an empty table in the shade, order a glass of (inexpensive and mostly very good) wine, and watch the world go by. We weren’t in a hurry, but, best of all, the servers didn’t seem to be in a hurry either. When we wanted our check, we’d have to catch their eye and request it, then wait a while longer for it to come. We never felt rushed to leave so they could seat another party.

When we travel, we seldom purchase souvenirs or other items we really don’t need. But Spain’s slower paced way of living was one keepsake we vowed to carry with us when we returned home.

I am submitting this post to Deb and Donna‘s What’s Been on Your Plate link-up. Check out their posts as well as the posts of other contributors.

Tag: slowing down

Rethinking My January Blues

The Spanish Art of Relaxing