Me: Well… I was hoping to finish my book for book club. Maybe do some stuff on the computer… putz in the yard… You?
Hubs: Well, I want to get that new kitchen sink faucet installed.
Me: ……
Hubs: You know, that one we’ve had in the box for several months now?
Me: ……
Hubs: I’m going to need your help.
Me: Um… sure.
Dear husband gathers his tools and all of the things he’ll need to complete the job (including the ancillary items he has purchased over the prior week), then puts together a handy-dandy platform so he can contort himself comfortably while under the sink.
I’m at the ready in case he needs me to hand him tools and parts… as I multitask on my iPad and read a few chapters of my book.
I am so grateful for my husband who not only has a lot of very handy tools, but knows how to use them. I’m also grateful that he dives into less-than-enjoyable projects that need to get done instead of putting them off like I tend to do. Because of him, we now have a new faucet that works beautifully… and no leaks!
There are several services that offer make-your-own meal ingredients delivered to your home. Blue Apron and Hello Fresh are two of the better known companies, but there are at least five others that I’m aware of.
The premise is pretty simple: after signing up for the service, you receive a refrigerated box of ingredients that have been specifically proportioned for each of that week’s pre-determined meals. The meals are designed by chefs, can be customized to your preferences (vegetarian, gluten-free, etc.), and each requires about 30 – 45 minutes of prep time.
Not all delivery services are available everywhere, but in our city Blue Apron appears to be the best known. We have received several mailers from them offering dollars off the first week of meals and discount offers appear in my Groupon feed all the time. I had been a little intrigued but not enough to try it until a neighbor took advantage of one of the offers and liked it. Then, the stars aligned when a fellow blogger, Denise of My Life in Retirement not only wrote a post about her Blue Apron experience, but offered a week’s worth of free meals to three of her readers (thank you, Denise!).
Here is a summary of our experience in case you are interested in trying one of these services too:
Delivery
About a week after registering for Blue Apron, a large box was delivered on our doorstep. Packed tightly inside were fresh vegetables, three different proteins for the three meals, starches, spices, sauces, and other “knick knacks” (as they call them) needed to complete each meal. All the ingredients were wrapped inside a foil liner and packed with gel-filled ice packs. Large, full-color recipe cards were included for each meal.
Meal Preparation
Our first week’s delivery included dishes made with shrimp, chicken, and beef. All required a certain amount of pre-prep (chopping, etc.) but it went quickly because most of the ingredients came perfectly proportioned and didn’t require measuring. Following the step-by-step instructions was easy and the meals came together with very little trouble.
Red curry & coconut shrimp stir-fry
Taste
We have prepared and eaten six Blue Apron meals so far. Although some were better than others, they were all good and satisfying. I like my food spicier than my husband does so we prepared the meals more to his taste, then I added more if needed. I thought the spices (depending on how much used) were bold and interesting. It was fun to use ingredients that we had never tried before – these weren’t same old, same old dishes.
Pros
Interesting ingredients and flavor combinations. The dishes were unique and the ingredients looked and tasted fresh.
The ingredients came already proportioned for each meal so we didn’t have to buy a whole jar of something when we only needed a tablespoon or two. This cuts down on the food and money waste of buying a lot when we need just a little.
The meals were complete. We could add a salad if we wanted, but the meals all included a starch and at least one vegetable.
Soy-glazed meatballs
The meals were kind of fun to prepare together. It was easy to divvy up the responsibilities which made the dinners come together smoothly.
The proportions were generous. My husband is a big eater and he felt satisfied when done.
We had three meals a week that we didn’t have to plan and shop for.
Cons
Three Blue Apron meals for two a week cost $59.94, including shipping (different delivery services costs vary). If you eat out a lot, spending about $10 per person, per meal isn’t over-the-top. If you do a lot of home cooking (which we do), it can seem a bit pricey.
Although the portions are generous, there really isn’t enough for another meal (so, of course, we ate it all in one sitting). We love leftovers so this was definitely a minus. If you aren’t enamored of leftovers this may be a plus.
We have found that our retired lifestyle can make meal planning challenging. Sometimes we have a late lunch and don’t feel like a big dinner or we decide to go out for dinner at the last minute. Having three pre-planned meals a week sounds pretty good, but once we had to make one of the “dinners” for lunch since we knew we wouldn’t be having dinner at home that day.
Packaging waste. This was the biggie for us. Blue Apron claims that its packaging is “eco-friendly,” but it isn’t very easy to recycle it, although they offer a “mail back” option. I was shocked at how much waste was left over after we prepared just one meal. We compost and we recycle curbside, but much of the packaging doesn’t qualify in our area. Plus they package each ingredient separately (for instance: one scallion inside its own plastic bag, a tablespoon of butter in a little plastic tub, 3 tablespoons of flour – flour??!! – in a baggie). There is a lot of negative reaction to the waste on social media and the internet, so I hope they are working on improving it.
Verdict
Because of some upcoming commitments, travel, house guests, etc., we have cancelled Blue Apron deliveries for now (they only allow the cancellation—not suspension—of service). Once life returns back to normal—or as normal as it gets for us—we will may start service again, but definitely not once every week until they improve the waste problem.
OK, I’m kidding. As grateful as I am for the work TSA officers do, it’s hard to imagine—and some studies have shown—that security checkpoints provide much more than an illusion of safety. Lines are getting longer, flights are being missed, and passengers are losing patience. With the summer travel season just beginning, it doesn’t look promising for those of us planning to fly the friendly skies.
One of the (many) reasons cited for the long airline security lines is that fewer people than anticipated have applied for the government’s Trusted Traveler programs. PreCheck allows members to move through security faster and Global Entry can expedite the customs process.
Last month, my husband and I applied for our Global Entry enrollment and soon we will have our appointment with the Department of Homeland Security for our final approval. If all goes well, we will receive authorization to take advantage of these two programs.
If you are a U.S. citizen and travel regularly or plan to travel, you might want to look into these Trusted Traveler programs too:
PreCheck gives you expedited screening at participating U.S. airports. You can pre-enroll and pay the application fee online, then visit an enrollment center for verification and fingerprinting.
Global Entry, for international travelers, provides expedited processing through Customs and Border Protection. As with PreCheck, applications and fee payments are done online. After a background check is completed, you will be asked to come in for an interview, verification and fingerprinting. Your Global Entry enrollment includes PreCheck benefits.
With travel in our future, I am so grateful for these programs. Although airline travel isn’t what it used to be and long lines are apparently the new normal, PreCheck and Global Entry will help make the process a little easier… I hope.
About twenty years ago, when we were about to embark on a major remodel of our house, my husband asked an interesting question: do we want to continue on our path to spend many thousands of dollars adding a master suite and several hundred square feet of living space, or should we instead spend the money traveling around the world?
We had spent months of searching before we finally found the home we bought. It was in a great neighborhood and had a wonderful view, but it was definitely a fixer-upper. When we purchased the house two years prior, we did so with the intention of tearing most of it down and starting over. When my husband asked his somewhat facetious question, I didn’t hesitate long before answering that I wanted to continue with the construction.
Looking back at that decision, I’m glad we chose that path. I love our house and our neighborhood and I don’t regret spending the last twenty years enjoying our life here, but I thought about my husband’s question recently as I was reading one of the several travel blogs I follow. The decision we made twenty years ago was the right one for us at that time. But, now that we are retired, I wonder if we could make a different choice. Could we lock up our house—or maybe rent it out long-term—and start to travel the world full-time? Is that a lifestyle we could embrace and thrive in?
Michael and Debbie Campbell have been travelling the world since July, 2013. They rented out their home and took off with the intention of being gone for 12 months. Almost three years later, they are still on their journey, mostly staying in Airbnbs. You can read a summary of their adventures in their April 18thSenior Nomads in Europe post.
Tim and Joanne Joseph sold their house in 2013 and have been traveling almost non-stop since then. Their wonderfully engaging blog, A Note from Abroad, (About page) often makes me want to jump on a plane and go.
Lisa Dorenfest is following her dream of circumnavigating the globe on a sailboat. Her journal of the multi-year “sailbatical” she has taken is captivating and her photography is stunning. Currently somewhere near Australia, Lisa will take you along with her One Ocean at a Time (Introduction Page).
I think it takes a certain type of person to make a commitment to living a life of continuous travel. As attractive as it might sound, most of us enjoy the comforts of home too much to be on the road (or seas) full-time. We yearn to see different places and have new experiences but, when we return to the familiar we are refreshed and rejuvenated.
The beauty of retirement is that we can stretch out our travels as much as our comfort and budget allows. My husband and I love to take short trips lasting several days to a week or so. We’ve also taken a few longer trips which have been wonderful, but traveling for three or four weeks at a time is about our limit. After a while, we want to go home and decompress.
But, who knows; one of these days we just may find the perfect house sitters or tenants, and we’ll hand over the house keys for a year or more. The time to do that is now, when we both are healthy and relatively courageous (gulp). At some point it will be too late; we will start to experience aches and pains significant enough to keep us close to home and/or we might feel less sure of our abilities to deal with stressful situations. When that happens, will I be satisfied with the life we chose or will I regret the path not taken?
Yesterday, as we were out running errands, I mentioned to my husband that it was the 2-year anniversary of my retirement. His response was, “Wow, really? Time has gone so fast, hasn’t it?”
Yes and no.
Although he was right that the two years went by rather swiftly, I also feel as if I’ve been living my retired life for a long time… and I’m getting pretty good at it. In fact, I don’t really feel “retired,” as if that word defines a specific post-work chapter of my life. I’m not just moving through a phase; I am fully engaged in my life. The Spanish word for retirement is jubilación, which I think is much more fitting.
Jubilacion, La Paz style
A few days ago, I was at an event where I didn’t know many people. I thought it would be interesting to do a little experiment if when anyone asked employment-related questions. I wanted to avoid describing myself as “retired” because I’ve found that often that word can be a dead-end to a conversation. I was interested to see if a different response could generate more engaging dialog.
It didn’t take too long to find myself in the familiar, polite back-and-forth that often occurs with a stranger in a social situation.
Polite Stranger (PS): What do you do?
Me: I dabble in photography, write a bit, read, and travel whenever possible.
PS: I mean, what work do you do?
Me: Some housework, although not as much as I should, perhaps. Also, yard work.
PS: No, full-time. I mean, what do you do full-time?
Me: Oh. I guess I don’t do anything full-time. There is so many great options that it would be impossible to pick something to do full-time.
PS: Really? Tell me about some of the things you are doing.
And, then the conversation really got interesting. I don’t think it came up that I was retired until quite a bit into the discussion. I also don’t remember if PS told me what kind of work she did… it wasn’t important. I learned some interesting things about her that had nothing to do with how she spent 8-9 hours of her day. Who we are is so much more than our chosen career. And, when we are no longer wrapped up in that career, being retired is just a single data point, not a description of who we are.
I am so grateful that two years ago I had the good fortune to be able to leave the work-world behind and embrace jubilación. The word may mean the same thing, but it sure sounds more like how I feel.
In my last GratiTuesday post, I wrote about my first grade teacher and how a group of her former students had honored her at a luncheon. We all had fond memories of having her as our teacher and were grateful to have the opportunity to thank her in person so many years later.
There’s actually a little more to the story that I’d like to share. It is a detail that taught me – in two very important ways – how simple actions can still have a profound effect many years later.
Soon after my mother passed away in 2000—when I was still rocking from my grief and loss—I came home to find the message light blinking on my answering machine. The call had been from my first grade teacher, Miss Miller, who I hadn’t seen since elementary school. She said that she had read my mother’s obituary and wanted to let me know how sorry she was… then she shared a story.
Miss Miller told me about a letter my mother had written to her almost 40 years prior, just after I had completed the school year in her class. In the letter, my mother said what an inspiring teacher Miss Miller was and that the positive experience I had taught me that learning could be both fun and gratifying.
In Miss Miller’s message to me, she shared how much the letter meant to her. When she received it, she was new to teaching and my mother’s kind words gave her much-needed acknowledgement and encouragement. She said the she had kept the letter and re-read it many times over the years. After saying good-bye, she hung up without leaving her contact information or any hint of how I could return her call.
If you’ve ever lost someone you’ve loved, you may know how much it can mean to hear stories about how they made a difference in someone’s life. More than all the well-meaning “I’m sorry for your loss” and “Please let me know if I can help in any way,” these personal stories help to ease the sorrow and keep the memory of your loved-one alive.
Since it was pre-Google when Miss Miller left her phone message, I was unable to locate her. The phone book didn’t have a listing for her and my former elementary school wasn’t any help. I wanted so badly to let her know how much her message meant to me but I was at an impasse in my search.
So, that is a big reason why—over 50 years after being her student and 15 years after her phone message—when I found out that not only was Miss Miller alive and well, but that a classmate was still in contact with her, I jumped at the chance to re-connect. I finally had the opportunity to tell her how much I appreciated her phone message and how grateful I was that she took the time to make the call. It was a thank you I thought I would never be able to deliver, and I admit there were a few tears when I did.
My gratitude to Miss Miller goes beyond her being a great first grade teacher, it extends to two important lessons she taught me years later by making one simple phone call:
Never miss an opportunity to write a letter of appreciation or encouragement. Your kind words will mean so much to the receiver and can lift them up well beyond the first reading. An email will do in a pinch, but nothing has the impact of a hand-written note.
When someone passes away, if you have a positive story or remembrance about them, share it with their loved-ones. Tell them how the person made a difference; share a funny story; express your admiration. Sharing how that person impacted your life—and the positive outcome it had—will help to buoy them in their grief.
Yesterday marked the 26th anniversary of my husband’s and my first date. I probably wouldn’t remember that specific day if it hadn’t occurred on Cinco de Mayo. My husband? He wouldn’t remember it at all if I didn’t remind him.
After 26 years together, we have mountains of shared experiences. We’ve been on numerous trips, attended countless events, and celebrated many, many milestones. We’ve also remodeled two houses together, dealt with several family tragedies, and supported and cheered each other through life’s ups and downs.
We’ve been through a lot together over the years; what I find fascinating is what each of us remembers… or not.
I guess there is only so much we can cram into our cranial cavities before some of it leaks out. What sticks tends to be what, for whatever reason, resonates with us; what doesn’t stick becomes jetsam that our brains jettison to lighten the load.
In addition to the date of the first time we went out, I remember other bits and pieces of relatively useless information that has long-abandoned my husband’s brain. I have a fairly vivid memory of the layout of most of the houses we looked at before we decided to purchase our home. I remember restaurants where we ate years ago, and often what each of us ordered. More useful, I have a much better memory of all of our vacations, where and when we went, what we did, and who we met.
My husband has almost no retention for the dates of past events and his memory of the homes we visited is almost nonexistent. If we are sitting in a restaurant we’ve dined at before, he will often have no recollection of having been there. When I tell him what he ordered, his usual response is, “did I like it?” Often, when I mention a shared experience from many years ago, he will look at me blankly.
My husband, on the other hand, has a much better memory for specifics of presentations we’ve attended, conversation we’ve had or been party to, and movies we’ve seen. When he recites snippets of a presentation or a conversation, I desperately try – often unsuccessfully – to rummage around in my temporal lobes for the same memory. He’ll harken back to a movie we saw months ago, recalling the plot and, often, reciting the dialog. I’m lucky if I can remember the name of the movie we saw the prior evening.
As far as we know, neither of us is experiencing age-related memory loss… it’s always been this way. Each of us is just better with different types of memories. I find that my memories tend to be more emotional and visual, his are more verbal. One’s not better than the other—both tend to be filled equally with useful and useless tidbits of information—they are just different.
After 26 years together, I think that it is safe to say that we’ve forgotten more bits and pieces than we can remember. Fortunately, it really doesn’t matter if he forgets the details of our first date or I can’t remember a movie we saw two months ago. What is really important is that we continue to make memories together. That and maybe we both should take notes.
Today is National Teacher Day, a day set aside to honor those who make special contributions to the education of our society every day. Although I have had many wonderful teachers over the years (including those who teach the adult learning classes I attend now), one of the most inspirational teachers I had was my first grade teacher, Miss Miller.
Miss Miller was the kind of teacher any kid would be lucky to have. She was energetic, creative, patient, challenging, loving, and so much fun. I can’t imagine what it must have been like to be faced with a classroom of 7- and 8-year-olds, most who hadn’t mastered the ability to sit still for any length of time, few who understood the concept of using their “inside voice,” and even fewer who had any idea what to expect and what was expected of them. Because our class had a combination of first and second graders, her job must have been even more challenging.
Although we entered her world with different childhood experiences and varying skill levels, on that first day we were all lumps of clay. Over the school year, Miss Miller skillfully worked her magic and slowly molded us into 30 young humans who, in addition to our academic lessons, learned to do our best, be nice to others, play fair, and to find joy in the process of acquiring knowledge.
I met some of my life-long friends in Miss Miller’s classroom. We made our way through grade school together and many of us went on to attend the same junior and senior high schools. Although our individual circumstances have changed over the years, the bond is still there. One was my Maid of Honor, I was a guest in another’s home in Hawaii for 3 weeks, and I recently traveled to La Paz with still another.
From one of those friends, I was thrilled to learn that Miss Miller was still living in the area and was as healthy in mind and body as ever. I asked my friend if she could set up a lunch for the three of us so I could see my favorite teacher again and tell her how much she meant to me.
Out of that lunch came the germ of idea: we would gather together as many students from our first grade class as we could for a Thank You Miss Miller celebration. We figured that we couldn’t be the only two who remembered Miss Miller with a special fondness.
We reached out to as many of our classmates as we could and asked each one if they were in contact with any others. Pretty soon, we had about 20 email addresses. Out of those 20, we were able to get commitments from 10 – not bad from a class of 30 students who, over the 50+ years in between, certainly had moved on, both figuratively and literally. Happily, we discovered that we all still shared an appreciation for our teacher.
The luncheon was a splendid success. Miss Miller (who will always remain Miss Miller to us even though she tried to have us call her Cynthia) was thrilled and touched by our show of gratitude. Her students—most of us now in our early 60s—had a delightful time catching up and sharing memories. As a special memento, we presented her with a book that contained thank you notes from each of us and our pictures, from first grade and now.
I am so grateful not only that I had the privilege of having Miss Miller as my teacher, but that I was able to thank her in person so many years later. How many 60-year-olds get to hang out with their first grade teacher?
Happy Teacher Day to all the amazing and dedicated teachers out there. You have made a difference in our lives and we are forever grateful to you!
My husband and I recently spent six days in Las Vegas. Neither of us are gamblers or heavy drinkers so the ubiquitous slot machines, card tables, and bars weren’t the beneficiaries of any poor choices on our part. We were there to attend an event, but added a few extra days to look around since neither of us had been to Sin City for many years.
We spent one day walking up and down the Strip, enjoying the kitschy fantasy hotels created to emulate great cities of the world, such as Paris, New York, and Venice. I have to admit the designers did a pretty good job capturing their essence… if Paris, New York, and Venice were filled with bright and noisy slot machines and cigarette smoke (OK, maybe they nailed that part).
The next day we took a tour of the Neon Museum and Boneyard, which features discarded signs from old hotels and casinos. This two-acre outdoor museum is crammed full of vintage neon; some of signs still light up (they offer an after dark tour but it usually fills up quickly), but most are in various stages of decay and show the lovely patina of age. The hour-long walking tour was full of history and the photo ops were glorious.
After our tour, we drove a few short blocks to the Mob Museum where we learned about the history of the Mafia, both in general and, more specifically, in Las Vegas. Although there are guided tours and audio tours available, we opted to take ourselves through the fascinating and well-organized museum. (Tours of both museums can be booked online, and there is a special price when you purchase the two together.)
As interesting as these museums were—and I do recommend them if you ever find yourself in Las Vegas—the main reason we were there was to attend Viva Las Vegas: a four-day extravaganza of music, cars, dancing, and a people-watcher’s paradise.
Viva Las Vegas is the largest Rockabilly festival in the world and attracts about 20,000 attendees from around the globe. The event features over 75 bands, North America’s biggest pre-1960s era car show, and hundreds of vendors selling vintage clothing and accessories. There are also fashion shows, tiki pool parties, and dancing, including demonstrations and contests.
Did I mention the people watching?
Although my husband and I love to swing dance, I didn’t know very much about Rockabilly or the Rockabilly culture. Viva Las Vegas provided an extreme immersion course. Apparently, there is a whole subculture that embraces a style that combines 1940s/1950s dress with tattoos and hair colors not found in nature. I was fascinated by these Rockabilly aficionados and we’d often find a comfortable seat just to watch them stroll by. As members of the selfie and social media generation, most seemed completely comfortable in their (heavily tattooed) skin and were happy to pose for pictures.
I couldn’t help but contrast myself at that age… trying so hard to fit in, but not stand out. If this was a “thing” when I was young, would I have gotten tattoos or dyed my hair a cartoon color? Probably not. I both admired them for their confidence, and worried for their future marketability in the job world. Hair color can be easily changed, tattoos… not so much.
We had such a great time that we already have our hotel reservations and tickets for next year. Although we won’t be getting tattooed in the interim, we do plan on picking up a few new dance steps and some vintage clothing before we return. It’s all part of the fun.
Apparently, I’m not very good at pre-scheduling posts… so this GratiTuesday is being posted on a Wednesday. I’ll be grateful if you can overlook my ineptness.
Finding a good book club was on my list of things to do once I retired. I had sampled various clubs over the years but none of them really resonated with me. Some had core groups that were so thick I didn’t think I could ever penetrate them and feel at ease. Some were much more about the social aspect than the literature so few members actually read the books, much less wanted to discuss them. One was so strict that missing even two meetings was grounds for being expelled.
I was looking for a club that had just the right mix of social interaction and intellectual stimulation. I wanted to feel like a welcomed member of the group and to be comfortable that most of the club’s reading selections would be books that I would enjoy. Being retired, I also needed it to be OK if I missed more than a meeting or two because of travel.
Then, out of the blue, a new friend mentioned that her book club wanted to expand its membership and asked if I’d be interested. She assured me that the club meetings were lively and fun but also the members were serious about the books. Since I knew her to be friendly, smart, funny, and interesting, I figured that her friends would the same.
Now, after six months, I am grateful to be able to say that I’ve found my book club. I have met a group of terrific women who made me feel welcome from the start. I have enjoyed books that I may have otherwise missed and discovered a couple of authors I liked so much that I have read more novels by them. Not all of the selected books have been great—we all have different tastes and interests—but the discussions have been lively and insightful. Each month, a different member chooses a book and hosts the meeting at her home. The atmosphere is always cozy and comfortable, and, because we enjoy breaking bread together, there is always good food and wine.
I was looking for a club that had just the right mix of social interaction and intellectual stimulation. I wanted to feel like a welcomed member of the group and to be comfortable that most of the club’s reading selections would be books that I would enjoy. Being retired, I also needed it to be OK if I missed more than a meeting or two because of travel.
Retirementally Challenged 